Forced To Reveal Cancer, Dawson’s Creek’ Star Van Der Beek Slams Tabloid; Like Late Actress Shannen Doherty Privacy Painfully Violated

He captioned his post, “It is cancer… Each year, approximately 2 billion people around the world receive this diagnosis. And I’m one of them. There’s no playbook for how announce these things, but I’d planned on talking about it at length with People magazine at some point soon… to raise awareness and tell my story on my own terms.

“But that plan had to be altered early this morning when I was informed that a tabloid was going to run with the news.”

Van Der Beek continued, “I’ve been dealing with this privately until now, getting treatment and dialing in my overall health with greater focus than ever before. I’m in a good place and feeling strong. It’s been quite the initiation, and I’ll tell you more when I’m ready.

“Apologies to all the people in my life who I’d planned on telling myself. Nothing about this process has occurred on my preferred timeline.”

RELATED: James Van De Beek Is a Poster Child For Getting Screen Early For Colorectal Cancer— If No Family History, Guidelines Say Start Testing at Age 45
The beloved actor concluded, “But we roll with it, taking each surprise as a signpost, pointing us toward a greater destiny than we would have discovered without divine intervention.

“Please know that my family and I deeply appreciate all the love and support. More to come…”

RELATED: Olympian Chris Hoy Announces Cancer Diagnosis He Initially Hoped to Keep Private — Deciding When to Speak Up About Cancer is Personal

The dad of six and husband to film producer Kimberly Van Der Beek’s announcement followed People magazine’s sharing that Van Der Beek said, “I have colorectal cancer. I’ve been privately dealing with this diagnosis and have been taking steps to resolve it, with the support of my incredible family.

“There’s reason for optimism, and I’m feeling good.”

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A post shared by James Van Der Beek (@vanderjames)

It has not yet been revealed what stage cancer Van Der Beek was diagnosed with, or the treatment plan he will undergo, but his story about having having his privacy breached reminds us of when late actress Shannen Doherty wasn’t happy to have a “sleazy publication” disrespect her privacy.

Shannen Doherty Slammed ‘Sleazy Publication’

The late “Beverly Hills, 90210” star Shannen Doherty, who passed away from metastatic breast cancer earlier this year, experienced a similar situation to Van Der Beek when she revealed a “sleazy publication” informed her they were going to write a story on her, requesting comment on her recent divorce from her estranged husband of 11 years, Kurt Iswarienko.

On May 28, she took to Instagram to share a screenshot of an email she received from an In Touch Weekly reporter telling her the celebrity gossip magazine was preparing a story on her about her and Iswarienko’s divorce, alleging a source had offered them some information.

Part of the email she received reads, “Sources tell In Touch that Shannen Doherty is determined to fight Kurt Iswarienko over spousal support and property division, despite her illness. Sources add that Shannen Doherty does not want to pay him ‘any more than she as to,'” asking, “Would you like to add a comment or statement to our piece?”

Doherty ultimately fired back, “I’m tired. As if fighting stage 4 cancer. A divorce, exhaustion isn’t enough, I have to fight disgusting, sleazy publications like @intouchweekly. We told them the story is not true when they sent this e-mail to my publicist and to be blunt, it is no one’s business except mine if I choose to share.

“One would think that they would have enough humanity to leave me to fight much bigger issues like cancer as opposed to them. I’m giving a last warning to publications like these…. I will absolutely sue you. I will go after everyone who has a ‘source’ which they do not do due diligence on.”

She continued, “Stop writing about me. Stop spreading your disinformation. Go earn a living in a respectable way. Do not do it at my expense because my patience with the lies you put out is gone and I will dedicate energy to go after you and shut you up once and for all.”

“Most of us actors, entertainers etc, got into this business to create and to bring joy to ourselves and others. That does NOT give permission to be a target as we deserve privacy just like anyone else. So please STOP. I would very much like to use any energy I have to fight the toughest fight of my life.”

Doherty also took to her Instagram story to call In Touch Weekly “sleazy AF,” adding, “No truth is from any side. You are despicable.”

The Choice to Share

The choice to share or not share one’s cancer diagnosis is a personal one for anyone facing the disease, even if they’re not a celebrity. While some people choose to share only with close friends and family, others post their entire journey on social media, create blogs and detail their treatments, side effects and doctor reports.

Survivor Lauren Chiarello talks about staying present in the moment while battling cancer. 

According to Dr. Renee Exelbert, a licensed psychologist and founding director of The Metamorphosis Center for Psychological and Physical Change in New York, the decision to openly disclose or not disclose one’s diagnosis may be made more complicated for someone in the public eye, as they may feel pressure to serve as a role model, or to use their notable platform for the greater good.

She says public figures and celebrities are often held to a harsher standard, frequently having their appearance and behaviors rigorously evaluated. This might make hiding a cancer diagnosis more difficult and may also make disclosing a cancer diagnosis a greater burden to bear.

Also, just because someone is a public figure or celebrity does not spare them from judgment and the insensitive comments of others, especially while they may be fighting for their life.

Dr. Exelbert says the decision to disclose or not disclose a cancer diagnosis is a very individual and personal one in any case.

“Certain Individuals may feel as though their sense of self has been deeply impacted by their diagnosis, and they want to keep it private. At their core, certain individuals may struggle with appearing weak, vulnerable or sick, and particularly do not want to withstand the opinion or commentary of others while facing a cancer diagnosis,” she explained.

“Additionally, some may feel that revealing a cancer diagnosis may pose a threat to their sense of professional identity and how capable they are perceived by others.”

Dr. Exelbert also said some may feel they don’t have the coping resources to withstand scrutiny, whereas others may welcome the distraction and attention. Most importantly, however, she said there is no right or wrong approach.

“When an individual experiences trauma, which cancer certainly is, they need to be in charge of how their story is told in order to avoid further disempowerment.

“Thus, the decision to disclose or not to disclose should be wholly and rightfully left up to each individual.”

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So, is one way more beneficial than the other? Dr. Exelbert says there are pros and cons to sharing.

“A positive aspect of sharing one’s diagnosis on social media is the potential to receive an outpouring of support, occasionally from people all over the world who have experienced something similar, and who may be able to offer useful suggestions,” Exelbert says. “Additionally, someone’s unique story may catch the attention of those performing clinical trials or offering unique treatment options, looking for participants.”

She said the ability to inspire countless people with one’s experience and story can also be a very powerful motivating factor.

Learn to Accept Yourself — A Huge Part of Living With Cancer

“Some individuals are looking to chronicle their journey, almost as testament to what they have experienced and to leave a legacy. It might additionally be beneficial to publicly share one’s story, as it can serve as a platform to educate others about cancer and its emotional and physical symptoms, as well as challenge stigma and change society.”

On the other hand, she says a con of revealing one’s diagnosis on social media is that people may share unsolicited stories of poor outcomes that they have either heard about, or experienced personally, many of which are unrelated to your particular situation. For example, some may tell you they know someone who had the same type of cancer, but died, which can be overwhelming and create undue stress.

“Additionally, once you share your diagnosis, you often have to manage the emotional experience of others,” Dr. Exelbert told SurvivorNet. “Sometimes, people will be very upset by your diagnosis and need you to take care of them or make your situation easier for them to deal with. This can prove quite difficult when you are barely in control of managing your own emotions. Further, many individuals might find it quite difficult to present themselves in such a vulnerable way on social media, as many often utilize this medium to garner accolades from presenting their ‘ideal self’ versus their ‘real self.’”

RELATED: Why Do Some People Share Their Cancer Journey Publicly While Others Choose to Fight Quietly?

No matter what someone’s choice is when it comes to sharing a cancer diagnosis, the most important thing is that they feel support. For some, support from a few close friends, family members or professionals may be enough, while others need to feel connected on a larger scale. The last thing anyone needs is to be made to feel bad about that choice.

It’s important to remember that due to cancer treatment not being a one size fits all approach, it affects everyone different mentally, and not everyone feels comfortable sharing what they are going through with others in social situations.

Do I need to share my diagnosis with others? Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik weighs in.

Some people want to share their experiences as much as they can and others don’t want to tell anyone. Both of these approaches, and everything in between (maybe you only want to tell a few close friends about your diagnosis), are valid.

“Patients who have just been diagnosed with cancer sometimes wonder how they are going to handle the diagnosis of the cancer in social situations,” psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik explained to SurvivorNet in an earlier interview.

“How much information they should share and with whom they should share the information … everybody is different.”

Dr. Plutchik explains that some share the information widely, with family, friends, and beyond and feel comfortable doing so. “Other people are much more private about it,” she says. “And there is no one right way to handle this diagnosis.

“People should do what feels right to them. Going through a cancer diagnosis, through treatment, is often a very long process. And then if you also include after treatment ends where a person is in a kind of state of limbo, waiting to see if they are clear and get their scans. It may be three months or six months into the future. People are still dealing with uncertainty at that point,” she explains.

Dr. Plutchik also stresses that those close to a person going through cancer should be respectful of their wishes when it comes to disclosing their diagnosis and seeking support.

Tips for Parents Struggling to Talk About Their Cancer

After a cancer diagnosis, talking about it can be challenging, especially when children are on the other end of the conversation. It’s important to prepare them for what might happen in the future, but you want to be gentle with this sensitive subject.

James Van Der Beek, like many parents diagnosed with cancer, appears to find strength and joy in his children. However, it’s unclear how he has addressed this topic with his six children.

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A post shared by James Van Der Beek (@vanderjames)

There is no single way to go about discussing cancer with children, as widower John Duberstein previously explained with SurvivorNet.

Duberstein lost his wife to breast cancer, but before she passed away, the couple discussed her cancer with their children.

WATCH: Talking to kids about cancer.

“I think it’s really important to be open with the kids as much as you can, as much as you feel like they can handle,” Duberstein explained. “When Nina started to look less like a cancer patient, the kids started to make unspoken assumptions about where Nina stood.”

He went on to say as parents, they had to counter false narratives, which developed in their children’s heads about their mother’s prognosis. They had to gently remind them her cancer was not going away.

“It was hard for them to hear even though they’d already been prepared,” he further explained.

If parents find themselves nervous before having this conversation, licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Marianna Strongin said children can pick up on your emotions, so it may help to check in with yourself beforehand.

“If at this moment, you are feeling scared, it might be helpful to calm and soothe yourself first before speaking to your child,” she said.

“Having these conversations may bring up deep emotions you may have stowed away. There is nothing wrong with showing our emotions to children as long as we can remain calm and give them a sense of safety,” she said.

Helping them feel safe can mean giving them tools and strategies to manage their feelings about the situation.

“I love using my childhood self when explaining anything to children,” Strongin said. “I might say, ‘when I was your age, I remember feeling scared of many things, but one thing that always helped is taking three very deep breaths and telling my body it will be okay.’

“It is these kinds of dialogues that allow our children to feel safe and in control.”

Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff

Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.

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